Quick Update

Just a quick update, since I'm about the head out for lunch, shopping, and movie with a friend. Have y'all seen Austenland? It's adorable. In fact, it's so cute, I'm going to see it again. If you're a Pride and Prejudice fan, it's kind of a must.

My weight is still hovering around 186.2. I finally decided to switch to biweekly weigh-ins since the weight loss is slower and/or more sporadic the closer I get to goal. These 5lbs to my next mini goal are taking FOREVER. But I'm trying not to stress about it, because then I just get stuck or say "screw it, I'm having chips". Things around here are busy enough without that nonsense. Even if the scale isn't moving, my clothes are bigger all the time. It's probably time to buy new bras and underwear - again. And people who haven't seen me in even just a few weeks, exclaim about how much smaller I look. So maybe things are just shifting around, even if the number isn't technically dropping? But man, would I like to be down 100lbs by the end of the month.

Tomorrow is my wedding anniversary. We're meeting for lunch at Maggiano's Little Italy. Yes, Italian, that's what this diet needs. Oh well, it's not like I can eat all that much anyway.

Trying to catch up on all your blogs, and hoping you're all doing well. Even if I'm not blogging, or behind on your posts, I still think about you guys and hope you're happy and successful.

Thursday Weigh-In and My Least Favorite Photo

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Thursday's weight: 186.2

-  1 lb loss

-74.8 lb loss since surgery
-94.8 lb loss overall

I do weigh in Thursday mornings, but I'm finding I'm too busy on Thursdays to actually post it. Good thing I'm the only one who cares about that.

This photo has been tormenting me on facebook for a year. My best friend posted it and even tagged me in it, because it's a picture of her oldest friend holding her new baby daughter. So I get it, but man, do those rolls kill me.

 

Last weekend, we celebrated her daughter's first birthday and I celebrate having fewer rolls to hate.

 

This is me yesterday, newly brunette and feeling sassy about it.

 

Thursday/Friday Weigh-In and a Recipe

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight (er, Thursday's weight): 187.2

-  2.8 lb loss

-73.8 lbs loss since surgery
-93.8 lb loss overall

I have a confession to make. I've been weighing in on Thursdays. I've been recording my Thursday weight, but posting it on Fridays. Basically, I've been doing an experiment to see if I'm right, that Thursday is always my lowest weight of the week. I've been a walking fiend this week, and yesterday I only ate about 1000 calories, and this morning's weigh-in was STILL higher than yesterday morning's (by .4 lbs but STILL). I don't get it. But suffice it to say, I've switched to Thursday weigh-ins. Apparently, Friday is not my friend, even before I indulge in pizza and wine.

But hey! 2.8 lbs? Obviously, there's something to be said for a wine and queso detox.

This week, I went to a lap band appointment (no fill needed, per the NP), a dentist appointment, took care of two sickies (husband and kiddo on the same day!), had an Ikea shopping and lunch date with my mom, cleaned house, re-organized my son's room (which included  not one, but two trips to The Container Store), and did tons of shopping and errands. And people worried I would be bored after quitting my job? Um, I don't have time for Netflix, much less to be bored.

This week, I tried this chicken salad recipe I found on Pinterest. I made less than it called for (I only had two cups of chicken) but I'll be cutting it in half next time. It simply makes too much for a banded person (especially at the 1/2 cup servings I was eating). But it was YUM and super high in protein!

Skinny Chicken Salad

Yield: 6 servingsServing Size: 1 (3 oz)

Ingredients

• 3 cups shredded cooked chicken
• 1 cup celery, chopped
• 1/2 cup chopped pecans
• 1 cup chopped grapes
• 1/4 cup finely chopped green onion
• 3/4 cup reduced-fat miracle whip (I subbed Kraft Mayo with Olive Oil)
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 1/2 tsp black pepper
• 1/2 tsp onion powder

Instructions

1. In a large bowl, mix chicken, celery, chopped grapes, and green onion.
2. In a small bowl, mix together miracle whip, salt, black pepper, and onion powder.
3. Cover chicken mixture with dressing and stir until well mixed.
4. Cover and chill chicken salad until ready to serve.

 

Now, I'm off to read about what you've all have been up to this week!

Friday Weigh-In and Thank God School Starts Tomorrow

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight (er, Friday's weight): 190.0

-  .6 lb loss

-71 lbs loss since surgery
-91 lb loss overall

Hi! I'm alive! It has been a really busy month. I can't tell you how thrilled I am that school starts tomorrow and we can establish a better routine around here. My weigh-ins have sucked. I've been overdoing it with the liquid calories, especially the wine. And there have been far too many festive weekends with booze and chips and queso. Then I'm up a pound and spend the rest of the week losing it, so it can start all over again. It's time for a chips and queso detox!

I did attend my local lap band support group meeting last week, and was reminded again that the last 20 lbs tend to be the hardest. I'm just now 21 lbs shy of my goal weight. So that might explain a little bit about why I feel so plateaued. I definitely bear the responsibility, of course. I haven't been staying on track or making the best choices. I think part of it also has to do with having spent the last 14 months restricting myself the vast majority of the time, and weighing in, and weighing food, and counting calories, and drink drink drinking the water, etc. It kind of chafes after a while and I've been feeling rebellious.

But it's time to get back on track, making good choices during the week so that small amounts of fun (smaller than I've been having) are possible on the weekend without sending me careening off the tracks. I've got a mini goal in sight and 9 lbs left to get to it! Hoping school starting up means I'll have more time for blogging and catching up with everyone. I've missed you guys!

Mid-Week Update

Thanks for all the support on hitting my mini goal! I told my husand "Nobody has ever received so much positive reinforcement for being overweight." We had a great grown-up weekend (as you can see below) with far, far too much wine and yummy Mexican food. Still paying for it. Ugh.

Me and the Mister.

I have not yet figured out a good routine while I'm home with my kiddo now. I hope it won't have to wait until he goes back to school for me to figure out this stay-at-home mom thing. But I've been home for almost a week and haven't yet managed to clean anything besides clothes and dishes.

Hope your week is less discombobulated!

Friday Weigh-In and Mini Goal Achieved

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 190.6

- 1.4 lb loss

-70.4 lbs loss since surgery
-90.4 lb loss overall

I've surpassed my mini goal of 191 lbs. The reason that weight was significant is because at 5'7, I am now in the 'overweight' BMI category. A year ago, I was 'morbidly obese'. That's pretty damned exciting. Now on to the next mini goal: 181 lbs for a 100 lb total loss!

Eleven years ago, when I dropped out of college for the second time, I needed a job pretty quick. A friend of mine said his company was hiring, and the starting salary was pretty good. I figured I'd take it until a I found something better. Then I spent the next 11 years aggregating and analyzing automotive data. It's just as thrilling as it sounds. Wednesday was my last day there. I think I'm going to like being a stay-at-home mom a little more. Let's just hope the money holds out, so I can do it for a while!

This weekend is my husband's birthday. The kiddo is going to stay with the grandparents, and we're staying at a cool hotel on South Congress (a fun shopping, dining, entertainment area in Austin) and getting some grown-up time. I won't even know what to do with two whole days of no one talking to me about Legos.

Hope you all have a great weekend!

Saturday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 192

- 1.6 lb loss

-69 lbs loss since surgery
-89 lb loss overall

So for the last several weeks, I'll be weighing less all week (I weigh daily) but when it comes Friday morning (the only weight I record) I'll be up, sometimes by a couple of pounds. It's not even usually due to going out and drinking the night before (although this week it was - oops). So I've been toying with the idea of doing my official weigh-ins biweekly, just to alleviate some of the stress of thinking I've gained multiple pounds overnight (probably not an actual thing that happens) when I'm actually just retaining water.

Only one more pound to my next mini-goal!

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 193.6

-  .6 lb loss

-67.4 lbs loss since surgery
-87.4 lb loss overall

I weighed in Friday morning, but didn't have time to post it, since we were headed to the beach for the weekend! These incremental losses are seriously frustrating. But I guess I should just be glad the trend is downward, instead of up.

How have you lost so much weight?

I get asked that question a lot. With close friends, I'm able to answer it easy enough. But since I chose not to disclose my lap band surgery at work, it's a little harder. I work in an exceptionally gossipy office. I fly under the radar whenever possible, and don't have a ton of close friends here anymore (my two closest ones quit years ago). I choose to keep most aspects of my life private, and this one wasn't any different. I absolutely didn't want to be gossiped about, scrutinized, or speculated about in any way. This was an extremely personal decision I made, and I have no interest in discussing it with people I consider merely aquaintances.

So when I get asked "How have you lost so much weight?", I have fairly vague stock answers. "I've made a lot of changes in the last year. I eat a lot less than I used to, I track everything I eat. And I try to be more active." All of those are true, but putting it that way still makes me feel dishonest.

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 194.2

-  .2 lb loss

-66.8 lbs loss since surgery
-86.8 lb loss overall

Like, seriously? .2 lbs? UGH. I've been seeing 193 on the scale ALL WEEK, until this morning. Maybe I had too much salt yesterday? I've been giving into my Pringles cravings far too much lately. They're only 150 calories per serving, but that salt cannot be doing me any favors. Once they're gone, I'm not buying any more, dammit.

So, let's talk about something less lame than my weight? I turned in my resignation this week. July 31st will be my last day. I'm going to stay home with my kiddo, and enjoy what's left of Summer break. I've got a lot of organizing I want to do, and some recipes I want to try. I'll get to walk him to and from school in the Fall, and get more steps in! Maybe eventually I'll figure out what I want to be when I grow up, and then I'll go back to work. But for now, I'm really looking forward to being a stay-at-home mom (though I prefer the less accurate, but more decadent sounding, "lady of leisure").

Illustrated

Well, I figured y'all hadn't seen me in about 20 lbs. I had to switch to leggings because all my yoga pants are too baggy. It made me feel a little dishonest, since the leggings (even though they too are a size too big) compress my tummy flab just a little. Y'all should see me run or swim. I jiggle like jello. Loose skin is just adorable, isn't it?

Pre-Op: 10/25/12     261 lbs



1/24/13     231 lbs



4/8/2013     215 lbs

7/8/2013      194 lbs

My Lap-Band disaster

"My Lap-Band disaster" is the headline of this Salon article. Go and read it, then come back and let's discuss.

This woman, who weighed 175 lbs, couldn't find a surgeon in the U.S. that was unethical enough to give her a lap band, so she went to another country to find one. She says that she read everything she could about the lap band, but if she had, she would have found out how crucial aftercare is. She'd know that flying to London a couple of times a year for a fill is not the extent of it. She'd know that the people who are the most unhappy or least successful with their lap band, tend to not have access to good aftercare (for example, this poor girl who got hers in Mexico) or go into the surgery ill-informed and with unrealistic expectations.

"Every time I tried to eat broccoli or carrots or anything healthy I used to enjoy, it would get caught in my throat and hurt so badly that I would race to the bathroom to puke." Nowhere in the article, does she talk about learning to chew, chew, chew, and eating slowly, all the lifetime behaviors we have to modify. Which, as you and I know, goes hand in hand with band. Obviously, her band was already primed when it was inserted. Due to her difficulties eating, she resorts to slider foods. We've all been there. But then, she goes to have FLUID ADDED.

Basically, I'm all stabby now that this woman - who did not meet the criteria for this surgery - got it anyway, and now gets to speak about it in a public forum. My husband urged me to comment on the article, but I avoid internet article comments like the plague. Comments are where hope goes to die. But I'm not above verbally abusing Salon on twitter, for that inflammatory headline, and for showcasing this author.

Weigh-In Friday

Today's weight is 194.4, same as last week. So this is what happens when weigh-in day falls immediately after a holiday. Hmph. Stupid milkshake. 

I hope you all had an excellent July 4th! I'm off today to hang out with this guy and see Despicable Me 2 (in 3D)!

 

Unfill

Had .2 cc taken out of my band this morning. Was able to swallow pills! And eat lunch without the aid of a glass of wine! I feel so much better.

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 194.4

-  1.6 lb loss

-66.6 lbs loss since surgery

-86.6 lb loss overall

I am still super tight, so it's hard to even feel good about being on track with weight loss. I was able to eat a soupy chili for lunch yesterday, but couldn't finish my usual amount. Then, I had rice with dinner, which was a mistake, but I didn't get stuck. But also wasn't able to eat the usual amount. Then I had ice cream. Because what's better when you're tight than slider foods?

This morning, I was an idiot, and tried to take my morning pills again. I take three morning pills, all of which are tiny. I've taken morning pills since I was a teenager (when I was diagnosed hypothyroid) and this is such an ingrained habit that I didn't even think about it. I've been able to do this the entire eight months (oh hi, forgot to do an eight month update!) that I've been banded. So, I got horribly stuck again. ON A ZYRTEC tablet. And yet again, I'm terrified to eat breakfast, and even cold liquids are going down SLOWLY. I know that I have been pretty lucky while I've been banded, that I've always been able to take my morning pills, and I've always been able to eat breakfast. But to me, that's how the band is supposed to work. I'm supposed to be able to eat and drink everything I need to, and I'm just not supposed to get hungry as often.

I called the lap band clinic to see about the possibility of a slight unfill today, which I did not have high hopes for. They don't do fills on Fridays. They did let me speak with one of the nurses (not the overly aggressive fill one) and she said that if I were to come in today, they have no x-ray tech on duty, so they'd be flying blind and would basically treat it like a dilated esophagus and remove a lot (if not all) of the fluid. If I wait until Monday morning, they can get me in, take an x-ray, and do a barium swallow to make sure everything is okay. Then, if it is, they can just remove a small amount of fluid. Which is, of course, what I want. She advised me to stay on fluids all weekend. Which is NOT what I want. I'll probably comply for the morning, but try solids for lunch and dinner. Otherwise, I'm either going to eat nothing but ice cream, or gnaw my arm off. I'm freaking hungry.

Mostly, I'm just mad at myself. I need to trust my instincts more, especially when it comes to my body. I really felt like .1 was all that I needed to get back to the satiety that I had before. I let the NP talk me into .2, since she thought I could even handle .3. I'm glad that at least I compromised. If I'd had .3, I probably wouldn't be able to get any solids down. As it is, I'm sad that I've lost the ability to eat breakfast, which was a cornerstone of my daily protein plan. And since I'm borderline OCD and a control freak, I hate that I can't fix this myself.

TIGHT

I went in Tuesday afternoon for an adjustment. I must have drawn the short straw and got the NP who likes to give really aggressive fills. After we talked about my hunger and how I'd previously been in the green zone, she thought I needed a .3 fill. Her rationale was that most people who fall out of the green zone usually need a .2 fill to get them back in place. But since I haven't had any particular foods that I can't eat, she figured I could handle .3. But since the last time she gave me an aggressive fill, I got stuck so much that I had to go in and have some fluid removed, I chose .2.

I was doing fine until yesterday afternoon, when I forgot that the band doesn't like me to take pills after a nap. I nap so rarely, that it's an easy rule to forget. But the band made sure that I WOULD REMEMBER. So that was a really awful stuck episode. I was a little afraid to attempt dinner later that night. But I took it very slowly, and took tiny bites. I made it to the last bite before getting stuck. But hey, now I get to cross "slime into napkin at table in fancy restaurant" off my bucket list.

This morning, my band is still a bit on the tight side. I'm sure my stuck episodes from yesterday didn't help much. Swallowing my tiny pills and sips of water was uncomfortable this morning. Taking big gulps of Crystal Light at work was also a bad idea. So I've basically been too scared to attempt food today. Hopefully, I just need time to adjust to the tighter band and for any swelling to go down. I have a "date" weekend planned with my husband, and eating figures prominently into it, so it would be nice to, you know, get to do that.

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 196

-  .6 lb loss

-65 lbs loss since surgery

-85 lb loss overall

I'm so relieved to not record a gain that I'm absolutely thrilled with a .6 lb loss. This has been a rough week. First, the diuretic shenanigans had my weight way up most of the week. Then, I stupidly didn't get a fill on Monday. So now I get to pay my copay again and go back next week to insist on a fill. Because I'm just too damned hungry. I want to shove everything into the gaping hole in my face. Apparently, I was previously in the green zone, didn't know enough to appreciate it, but sure know when I'm NOT.

We're headed out of town to New Braunfels for the weekend to relax, swim in a hotel pool, and eat awesome Mexican food with friends. Hope you all have a great weekend!

Second Thoughts and Panic, the Usual

Since I didn't get a fill on Monday, I've now decided that it was an EPIC MISTAKE. I'm too hungry. Starving in the morning, hungry between meals, fantasizing about junk food. Sigh. It's going to be a very long month.

In related news, whoever made this needs to STOP WATCHING ME.

None of my impulses are good.

I had a wild impulse on Friday night to stop taking my blood pressure medicine and diuretic. I tried to get my primary care doctor to take me off of it at my last appointment, but I think she felt like "why mess with it if it's working?" But she's not the one who has to take two extra prescriptions a day. So, I decided to stop taking them and see how my blood pressure was at my lap band appointment this morning. The good news is, the blood pressure was perfectly normal. The bad news is that without the diuretic, I swell up like a Thanksgiving parade balloon. I'm up 4-5 pounds from Friday's weigh-in, and I did not eat 5lbs worth of crap all weekend.

The nurse practitioner said I probably shouldn't abruptly stop taking both medications. And yes, she probably has a point. She suggested that I stay on the diuretic for now, and start tapering off after a month. So, I'll try that, and see how my blood pressure looks when I go back for next month's appointment. And now that I'm back on the diuretic, I'll be taking about one million pee breaks.

I did not get a fill today. The NP didn't see the point. My weight is going down, yet I can eat whatever I want. It's sheer will-power alone that keeps me from eating entire loaves of French bread. She said if I still want a fill next month, I can have a little one.

Here's another picture from our trip to Disney World. My 12 year-old sister went with us. She weighs 83lbs. I have now lost the equivalent of one Abby.

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 196.6

- 1.6 lb loss

-64.4 lbs loss since surgery

-84.4 lb loss overall

Lowest weight in 15 years! The teachers at my son's daycare have all been making a big deal about how great I look, saying they don't even recognize me at first. I can get used to this.

I have no idea what is even happening with me, weight-wise. I feel like I could eat ALL THE THINGS, but I usually don't, and I'm still losing weight. But I'm not going to question it too much. I have a lapband appointment scheduled for Monday. I've been debating getting a tiny fill (like .1) since I only have 6.3cc in my band, and it would be nice to be less hungry sometimes. But then, I think I'm only hungry when I'm supposed to be, like when it's been at least 3-4 hours since my last meal. And obviously, I'm losing at my current level, so maybe I shouldn't jinx myself? Nobody can make a giant deal out of .1ccs like me.

Now that I've hit Onederland, it's on to the next mini-goal! Which is: 191 lbs. Way to set the bar low, right? The thing that is so special about 191 lbs is that it would put me in the "overweight" BMI category, instead of the "obese" one. And then, after that, it's only another 10 lbs to hit my 100 lb weight loss! Which, if you'll remember, involves PRESENTS.

Disney World

Thoughts on Disney World and Universal Studios: fun, humid, obscenely crowded, long lines, absurdly expensive.

We were delayed on our flight there, arriving 12 hours late and exhausted. It rained on and off, the entire time we were there, sometimes POURING on us. The weather did horrible things to my hair, that are now preserved in photos, and I may never forgive. I successfully ate from the surprisingly good Disney kids menu all week, which was very helpful. I wore my fitbit and logged insane miles, nearly every day we were there (Epcot day was NINE MILES). We missed lots of fun rides due to the long lines and waits being simply too much. Next time, we may save a few thousand dollars and just drive to San Antonio and take the kid to Six Flags. If we buy him enough souvenirs, he may not notice the difference.

And now, some photos!

Much more comfortable seatbelt than the last time I flew.

Me and the kiddo riding flying Dumbos.

At the Wizarding World of Harry Potter - with butterbeer!

How many calories are in a butterbeer? Who cares?! It was delightful!

Immediately after coming back, I headed off to ATX Television Festival all weekend, and did even more walking. Got to go to lots of fun panels and screenings, including Friday Night Lights, My So-Called Life, Vampire Diaries, and Veronica Mars (where I got to meet the beloved creator, Rob Thomas). Super fun times for a TV geek like me.

What have you guys been up to?

P.S. Oh, and in case you missed it, I hit ONEDERLAND last week!

Wonder

As in, I wonder how the hell this happened. 

 

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 200.8

- 1.8 lb loss

-50.2 lbs loss since surgery

-80.2 lb loss overall (the MFP ticker refuses to update to this effect)

So I didn't quite reach Onederland by June, but I can see it from here. Hopefully, I'll make it by June 8, the one year anniversary of my lap band consultation. A year ago, I never let myself imagine this far ahead. I knew people had been successful with the lap band, but I didn't really think that I might be one of them. I never wanted to be thin. I've never been thin in my entire life, and the thought of it is completely alien. But I never even imagined losing more than 80 pounds.

The truth is, I've weighed over 200 pounds most of my adult life. Weighing less than that, for me, is associated with adolescence. You know, painfully awkward, horribly self-conscious, adolescence. That time of my life where I pretty much constantly hated my "fat" body. I was definitely more confident and comfortable in my own skin at 280 pounds than I ever was in my high school body. Even though I've spent the last year on this weight loss journey, the slowest part has definitely been the emotional adjustment to living in a different body.

We leave Sunday for Orlando. I'm going to Disney World and Universal Studios with my family, and I'm pretty excited for the non-scale victories that await.

Rewards

This morning's weigh-in showed that I've hit 80lbs lost. It's not official until Friday weigh-in, of course. But, in the interest of celebrating/rewarding with something other than food, I got a new Summer dress.

I had a really great collection of sundresses, but they all ended up in the donate pile after the last closet clean-out. One NSV I've noticed? Non-plus size clothes can be WAY cheaper. $20 sundresses blows my mind. I think I could get used to this.

Seven Month Update

Starting weight (6/8/12): 281 lbs
Surgery day (10/26/2012): 261 lbs
Current weight: 202.6 lbs (down 1.6 lbs from last week)

- 58.4 lbs since surgery
- 78.4 lbs loss overall

This time last year, I was on a girls weekend trip.

Memorial Day Weekend 2012 - 281 lbs

That was a size 3X dress from some plus size website. I was finally ready to make a change, and I had scheduled my lap band consultation.

Memorial Day Weekend 2013 - 203 lbs

That's my game show hostess pose for y'all. One year and 78 lbs later (bat wings come at no extra charge), and I'm wearing an XL dress from an Old Navy store where I can just walk in and buy clothes that fit me whenever I want.

It's been a good year.

No Friday Weigh-In

The scale and I do not agree today. So I'm saving weigh-in for Sunday, which is my 7 months post-op. Unofficially, I weighed exactly the same as I did last Friday. Which boggles my mind a little, since I didn't eat more than 1200 calories a day all week. Ever have one of those weeks? When you feel like you did everything right, but the scale is not impressed? And I cleaned my closet out again - two more trash bags full of clothes that are too big!

On Wednesday morning, I actually saw 202.8 on the scale. But then I ran out of the prescription diuretic that I take to combat the swelling/water retention caused by the high blood pressure medicine (which I'm hoping to get off of soon). I'm back on the diuretic, but maybe it takes times to work? That's what I've decided anyway.

I had an appointment with my primary care physician this week. They did some blood work to check my thyroid (I've been hypothyroid practically all my life), cholesterol, HDL, triglycerides, etc. All my numbers came back better than they were in December, except for my triglycerides. That one is borderline high, but not like HIGH. Hoping that continuing to lose weight, and trying to get more steps in every week will help with that. I don't think I could handle fish oil supplements.

SOOOO looking forward to this three day weekend! I'm getting my hair and toes done. I plan to look fierce. Now tell that scale to help a sister out.

Super Grumpy Today

One reason I'm a grump today is because my fitbit hates me. No really, it does. We've bought my husband a fitbit, and he's also syncing it up with MyFitnessPal, like I do. Yesterday, he walked 3600 steps, and fitbit synced with MyFitnessPal, giving him an extra 275 calories. Yesterday, I walked 5200 steps and fitbit synced with MyFitnessPal, giving me 63 calories.

The day before that, it gave me 14 calories in the afternoon. Then, when I synched later in the evening, it took them away.

WHY? Why does it hate me?

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 204.2

- 1.8 lb loss

-56.8 lbs loss since surgery

-76.8 lb loss overall

I've been quiet this week. I almost apologized for it, but then I figured y'all survived fine without me. And I have a hard time imagining anyone sitting around wondering where that crazy Kay has been. Just figure I'm off eating cookies. They were a Mother's Day present and they were delicious. Not sorry! But I did log extra steps in the fitbit for every single one of them.

It's been a fairly uneventful week, except for the sinus infection that's hit me, at the worst possible time. It's going to be a busy couple of weeks of doctor appointments, end of school, kindergarten graduation (ludicrous tradition) etc, before we're off to Disney World on June 2.

I'm toying more and more with the idea of quitting my job this Summer. The husband starts a new job at the end of the month, paying just a tiny bit more money, but with better insurance options. And I've been at my current job for nearly 11 years, have never loved it, and am so burnt out that I can barely stand it. I've been fantasizing about being a stay-at-home mom for a very long time now. Getting to walk my kiddo to and from school, keeping my house clean (and organized) without having to pay someone else to do it, grocery shopping on a week day! I'm going to keep crunching my budget spreadsheets until I can make it happen. I would do it tomorrow, but my company gives an annual bonus in August that would pay off a credit card or more. That would make the math work a bit better.

Hope y'all have a great weekend!

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 206

- .6 lb loss

-55 lbs loss since surgery

-75 lb loss overall

I actually saw 206 on the scale last Saturday morning, but after that, it was all bad news from there. So I'm actually relieved to be recording any kind of loss rather than a gain today. This week was crazy hectic and stressful and I forgot to bring my breakfast twice. Yesterday, I ate two pop tarts for breakfast, which I hadn't had in years. They weren't even good, but it actually seemed like the least awful choice in the office vending machine. Considering they have this option, I figured I could have done worse:



And it smells AMAZING when people heat it in the microwave.

I also had far too much salt this week. Chips and queso, why can't I quit you? Just hoping I'm not too behind on my mini-goal of Onederland by June.

 

I'm enjoying my new Fitbit, although it wants me to walk 10,000 steps a day, and I average about 5,000 steps a day. Not sure how I can manage more steps in my day, unless I quit my desk job to be a stay-at-home mom (which would be AWESOME). Because all my activity spikes are when I'm home. Lots more moving when there's laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc. to do.

 

Hope you all have a fantastic weekend! Happy Mother's Day, moms!

Me and the Kid

I'm solo parenting this week while my husband is on a business trip. He goes away on business so rarely, that it's always a little weird. I stay up too late watching TV, and the 6 year-old and I eat macaroni too often. Before dad went out of town, we took him to see Iron Man 3 and he was SO excited, he could barely stop bouncing.


He's growing up too fast.

 Last night, we took a break from macaroni and fish sticks (one of his favorites) to eat one of the light dinners he likes. Summer sausage, smoked gouda (he's very particular about his cheeses) and Ritz whole grain crackers (he doesn't know about the whole grain part). This meal could use some vegetables, but he won't eat them, and I needed more protein.

Mine is the yellow plate, and considering I didn't finish all that summer sausage (which was the 2oz serving size), I ate the same amount of food as a 6 year-old. That blows my mind.

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 206.6

-2.2 lb loss

-54.4 lbs loss since surgery

-74.4 lb loss overall

 

No weigh-in photos for me while I'm way overdue for a pedicure and have silly tan lines from my flip-flops! Been so busy dealing with trying to refinance our house, husband transitioning jobs, and so much needs to be done around the house. But, it's okay, since according to my husband, we don't have a stressful life.

 

As you know, I'm all about buying myself presents, so I ordered myself a Fitbit! I'm super excited. Now I'm gonna walk laps around the office like Mon. Which is a far better use of my time than online shopping or PINNING ALL THE THINGS. I suppose I could work when I'm at work, but where's the fun in that?

 

Gotta admit, I really wish they had it in pink.

 

 

 

Presents

Someone told me again today how great I'm looking. My gosh, that just never gets old.

So I've been mulling over getting myself a present when I've lost 100lbs. No, it won't be goal yet, but 100lbs is a bit more official sounding than 111lbs, or whatever silly goal I have. Plus, maybe it would serve as a reminder to keep that 100lbs off. Because if I gained it back, I wouldn't feel like I deserved to still wear that present. Because I'm thinking jewelry, of course. Just a little something from some little store, maybe.

How long does it take you to eat?

When I was waiting for insurance to approve my lap band surgery, I started trying to stretch my meals out to 20 minutes. I despaired of ever managing it on a regular basis. Then, once I was banded, I thought I would never learn to chew slowly. Well, I think I have managed it. Since my meals easily take 30-40 minutes. Sometimes longer.

Today, for lunch, I timed myself. I ate 3 oz. of grilled chicken and a 1/3 cup of pinto beans. It took me 37 minutes.

So, I'm curious. How long does it take you to eat? Do you stop after a certain time? Does your surgeon have max time rules? Do your ears hang low? Do they wobble to-and-fro?

Six Month Update

Starting weight (6/8/12): 281 lbs
Surgery day (10/26/2012): 261 lbs
Current weight: 208.8 lbs

- 52.2 lbs since surgery
- 72.2 lbs loss overall

My lap band is six months old today! I'm 9 lbs away from Onederland! WHAT.

I've lost 11 lbs in the last month, which feels really good. Last month, I only lost 4 lbs. I have this weird bone that's started protruding near my neck that I can feel and sometimes see. WebMD says it's a collar bone, but I've never had one of those, so I'm not so sure. We had a really good lap band support group meeting last night. I received some good reminders that even though goal feels far away sometimes, I've lost over 70 lbs and that's AWESOME.

Next mini goal is Onederland by June!

I have a vivid imagination.

Last night, while I was finishing my dinner, my husband reminded me that I haven't returned a phone call from a parent of one our son's friends. I told him that I hadn't had time, was feeling stressed and overwhelmed, and just wanted to focus on my dinner at the moment. (Because what a freakin' chore that can be. Am I right, ladies?) He then said he doesn't understand why I'm stressed, since we don't have a stressful life. Oh, really? I'm so glad to hear that about us. And then he yelled a filthy curse word because he accidentally broke the coffee pot he was cleaning, slicing open his finger. While he went to deal with his bleeding hand, I tossed out the rest of my dinner and finished the dishes. His sliced hand probably saved him from many things.

I've been composing a blog entry in my head all day, all about the different things on my plate and the separate things that are making me feel overwhelmed. But honestly? Just thinking about all that was stressing me out even more. Suffice it to say that I'm having a rough week. This is also the beginning of the time of year when  I really wish that we could afford for me to quit my job and stay home. My kid is about to be out of school for the Summer, and I'd like to spend time with him, take him to the pool, the library, the Children's Museum, make a fun Summer of it. Instead of paying to send him to daycare every day. But I haven't been able to make our budget work for that.

My in-laws have been down for three months. They don't stay with us, they rent a condo about 40 minutes away. But we see them nearly every weekend, and spend far more time with them than we do with my family, since they're only here for three months. Now they've put in an offer on a house, and plan to sell their house in New York and move here. It will be nice to have them here, and have free babysitting whenever we need it. But I'm used to having them 2000 miles away, not 40 minutes away for most of the year. It's complicated.

Only five more weeks until we take two kids on a trip to Disney World!

Whew! So glad all that stress is just in my head.

Friday Weigh-In

Yes, I'm aware that today is not Friday. I was running around on Friday, getting ready for my son's 6th birthday party. Saturday was the party. Sunday was clean-up and recovery. But, I did weigh myself on Friday.

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs

Today's weight: 210.6

-2 lb loss

-50.4 lbs loss since surgery

-70.4 lb loss overall

I would post a picture of my birthday boy, but he was too busy bouncing in the bounce house and not available for photos. Here's one of me with my college best friend.

Appropriately attired for a superhero party.

Things They Don't Tell You in the Seminar, Part 3

Y'all are the only ones who could appreciate this horror story. So I was out to lunch today at a BBQ place. Their lean turkey and a small serving of cole slaw hadn't been a problem before. But the turkey seemed on the dry side today, and the cole slaw was requiring a lot of chewing. Right when I decided I'd had enough, I got stuck. Of course. I was having a hard time on the short drive back to the office, bad chest pain. I never PB (at least I don't think so, I figure I'd notice) but I do slime. This time, it felt like I was going to PB. I was trying desperately to get back to the office and run to the bathroom to slime in semi-privacy. But, before I could even make it to my parking place, I coughed up a handfull of slime. Like everywhere. Oh, and did I mention my guy friend from work was in the car with me? Which was handy, when I needed someone to reach into the glove compartment to get me some kleenex. (As if mere kleenex would help? Why don't I have a towel when I need one?) Luckily, he knows about the lap band, but I don't think he was familiar with the graphic details. Well, he is now.

Mini Goal Achieved!

Posting a special Tuesday weigh-in! And sorry, the pics absolutely refused to load as landscape.
My husband's weight:



The husband goes on record
as stating he doesn't appreciate
being exploited for my blog.

 And my current weight:

I'm 5'7 and he's 6'1, so it makes sense for me to weigh less than him. But this is the first time it's ever happened. I feel daintier already!

Superfan Reward

Hope you all had a great weekend! I definitely did. Except for that part when I almost passed out a bar Friday night. And no, it wasn't because I was sloppy drunk. I'd only had a couple of drinks, but the line to order food was so long that we never bothered, plus it was standing room only, and I hadn't eaten since lunch. I had to sit down on the ground and put my head on my knees. It was embarassing, but I managed to pull it together.
And then, I met Jason Dohring! Unless you're a Veronica Mars superfan like me, or a Ringer fan, it's totally okay to say "Who?" But it was kind of the highlight of my year. If only we'd known he was going to be at the party, we would have dressed cuter!



Me, Jason Dohring, and my friend Meredith

 P.S. If you've never seen Veronica Mars, I'm going to have to insist that you remedy that right now. Go ahead, I'll wait.

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs
Today's weight: 212.6

-3.4 lb loss

-48.4 lbs loss since surgery
-68.4 lb loss overall

3.4 lbs! I kind of can't even believe it. I took a picture this mornng, because I didn't think you guys would believe it either. 3.4 lbs! That's not a bad week.

My latest fill has been working pretty well. I don't seem to need to snack as often, and have been able stay under my daily calorie limit. Although if I splurge just a little, like 1500 calories? I can be up a pound immediately. It's super annoying.

I did get stuck three times in the last week. Two of them were clearly my fault, eating too fast, or too big of a bite. The third time, I'm pretty sure my meal was just too dry. But luckily none of the episodes were so bad that I couldn't eat for the rest of the day or anything. Just bad enough to have me kicking myself.

This weekend is the last time my snow bird in-laws will be providing free babysitting before they head back to New York. Guess I need to do it UP! Have a great weekend!

Before and After

Photo documentation is my least favorite part of this experience. But I know that it helped me to see other people's photos, while I was deciding whether to get banded or not. And it's a good illustration of how this can be a long, slow journey.


Pre-Op: 10/25/12     261 lbs



1/24/13     231 lbs



4/8/2013     215 lbs

How about that awesome farmer's tan I got last weekend? I may someday have to come to terms with the fact that I'm never going to like my stomach. All those years of being fat, plus that time I gestated a small human for 10 months, have really done a number on it. I don't see much difference between now and 15 lbs ago. But at least I can see a difference between surgery and today.

NSV: The Tiniest Zip Line in Texas

This weekend, at a cajun festival in a little town in Texas, I rode a zip line. It was a tiny zip line over a bounce house, just like this:

But I would not have done that 65 pounds ago. And that was the whole point of getting lap band surgery. I was tired of my weight preventing me from doing things I wanted to do. I don't want to exceed the weight limit anymore. (I made my mother-in-law go check and see what the limit was before I even made up my mind. It was 240.) I don't want my size, or even just fear of being fat in public, to keep me from doing anything. Even ridiculous stuff like a bounce house zip line. Next time, I'll make sure they take pictures!

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs
Today's weight: 216

-1.8 lb loss

-45 lbs loss since surgery
-65 lb loss overall

I just love round numbers! Don't you?

I'm feeling pretty good about my new fill. Just trying to remember to chew, chew, chew and sip SLOWLY.

My husband finally got his vacation time approved and I just booked our trip to Disney World! I'm so excited! We're going the first week in June. (Ugh, Florida in June and crowds, I know.) We're headed out as soon as the kids finish school. We're taking my almost 6 year-old son and my 12 year-old sister. We're also going to Universal Studios and the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Butterbeer! I may be more excited than the kids! Seriously. I've already started planning my outfits on Pinterest. Hi, I'm OCD Girl! Have suitcase (and travel insurance), will travel!

Tightening The Zip Tie

So I put on my big girl pants (metaphorically speaking, since I actually had to get rid of those because they were too big) and went in to get an adjustment yesterday. I let them (seriously, I have to be talked into this) add .2, for a total of 6.3 in my 10cc band.. That may not seem like a lot, but I had a slight unfill when I was at 6.2, because I was getting stuck too often. But now that I know that every fill means bites need to get smaller. No really, they say that when you have surgery, but this time they really mean it. Maybe this time I'll remember it. Maybe.

Yesterday, immediately after my adjustment, I got stuck on a protein smoothie. Yes, I took too big of a gulp (I hadn't eaten yet and was staring down a day full of liquids - I was STARVING), but this is a beverage. Uncomfortable, but not as bad as being stuck on solids, I suppose. So, now I know. Smaller bites AND smaller sips.

So how good are you at following the rules of the post-fill liquid diet? Do you cheat a little? Maybe have some chunky soup at night, so you don't gnaw your arm off in your sleep? Asking for a friend.

Holiday Recovery

I hope you all had a good Easter! I was running around so much getting ready for it that I had no time for snacking or chai lattes. By Sunday morning, I was down another two pounds from Friday weigh-in! But Easter festivities (and leftovers) took care of that. SOMEONE GET THIS JUNK OUT OF MY HOUSE.

I asked my husband this morning if he minded if I brought the leftover pies (oh yes, plural) into work. He didn't understand why I wanted to get rid of them so fast. Dude. You're the one who drove me to lap band surgery. Considering how I never shut up about it, I'm mystified how he could forget that I'm a calorie counting fool and - do you KNOW how many calories are in a slice of apple pie? And that's not even counting the Blue Bell ice cream that you just have to put on top.

So, this morning I wrapped up one slice of pie (that he'd better eat tonight and not leave it there taunting me) and brought the rest of the pies and leftover rolls into the office so the breakroom vultures can go to town. I'm on my second giant cup of water and it is back on track time.

I have an adjustment appointment tomorrow morning. I'm paralyzed with indecision over whether to get a fill. I feel like I could be less hungry and maybe need to snack less (though I usually make good, protein friendly choices). But I loathe the idea of getting stuck more easily, or not being able to eat the occasional small servings of bread and pasta. I'm a Libra, so balance is vital to my life. And no, I'm not really a crazy lady. I just sound that way.

BYOC

Courtesy of Draz, I brought my own crazy.

1.What’s your first reaction when you get really angry?
I picture myself like a cartoon character, with steam coming out of my ears. But I’m probably just very loud and profane. I do not bottle up. Just today, I went off on a tirade about how CAPTCHA is the scourge of humanity. I spend so much time trying to convince Blogger that I’m not a robot, that I’m now convinced I may in fact be a robot. I may also be prone to hyperbole.

2. When is the last time you cried in sadness or in joy?
I am a crybaby. I cried during New Girl the other night, and the last time In Her Shoes was on TV, and if I just THINK about The Fault In Our Stars… It’s ridiculous.

3. If the stars aligned and everything was perfect from your partner to your job and income and everything – how many kids would you choose to have?
If everything were perfect, I’d have a second, because I am dying for a little girl. And in this perfect world scenario, I get to pick the gender, right? But in the imperfect world, I don’t think we can afford another, and I’m 35. Our son is going to be 6 in a few weeks, and I kind of feel like I missed my window. But I grew up an only child and was just fine. More peace and quiet for reading! And who knows? Maybe one day we’ll look into fostering. I always thought I’d be pretty awesome at that.

4. If you won the lottery – what is the first purchase you’d make?
Oh no! This is so hard! I want ALL OF THE THINGS! I’m already a compulsive spender, so I can’t imagine the damage I’d do if I got to spend on an epic scale. But the very first purchase would have to be an awesome dinner out, at the best restaurant in town, plotting how to spend our millions. With spreadsheets. Cause that’s how I roll.

5. Repeat question. Summarize your week in real life and in blog land.
I was so busy in blogland, I forgot to do any work at the office! Oops. Oh well, better luck next week. Now I’m off to plan Easter dinner. My mom and Grandma are letting me host this year, and they never let me host. So, basically, they’re waiting for me to screw up. Wish me luck!

Friday Weigh-In

Starting weight: 281 lbs
Surgery day: 261 lbs
Today's weight: 217.8

-2.2 lb loss

-43.2 lbs loss since surgery
-63.2 lb loss overall

After last week's .2 loss, my scale owed me. It's a good thing no one was there to see me do a happy dance in the bathroom this morning, because I am a terrible dancer.

I was a good lap banded girl this week. Brought my breakfast and lunch to work every day, and refrained from restocking my office candy bowl with Easter Rolos, which I would have eaten all week. I did have one Cadbury egg, which I entered into MyFitnessPal (150 calories, thank you very much) but otherwise held it together this week. I make no promises about Easter Sunday.

Was just reading Mon's post about portions, which reminded me that even though I am getting better at some of these lapbander rules, I still have a ways to go. I have my small plates and bowls, and my smaller forks, but since I'm not in the green zone yet, I am no 1/2 cup meal girl. Last night, at lap band support group, half of them talked about eating 1/2 cup at every meal, and it blows my mind. But I have definitely changed. Below is dinner from the other night.


Sorry if my carbs offend you. I count every calorie and gram
of protein that goes in my mouth. THERE WILL BE CARBS.

And I didn't even finish everything on my smaller plate. My husband got half of my potatoes. Five months ago, my plate would have been as full as his.

Do any of you eat 1/2 cup meals or is that some kind of lap band urban legend?